Dear Mr. McCain,

You are applying for the job of my president. I have a few questions.

In 1987, you were involved in meeting with financial regulators investigating a savings-and-loan owned by real estate developer Charles Keating, a man who was also involved in real estate deals with your wife and father-in-law. A later Senate Ethics Committee investigation concluded you showed 'poor judgment' in this matter.

Still, in April of this year, the New York Times detailed a number of deals involving your help for a real estate developer. And the man you appointed to head the GOP convention this year, Doug Goodyear, resigned after Newsweek reported that he had once been a paid lobbyist for the thuggish military regime in Burma.

So, Senator, can you demonstrate to me that you are any better about choosing your associates, and what you do on their behalf, now than you were with Keating?

Also, Senator McCain, like me, you are a cancer survivor. I think that, since you are running for president, you should disclose to the public the latest detailed information about your current health status. Yet, despite having promised to release your medical records a number of times, they still haven't been released. I have to say that, personally, this makes me suspicious. I'm usually pretty chatty when I've had a clean check-up; it's when there's something potentially troubling that I start getting quiet. So, like, just what's up with that?

I realize that health records are personal, but, hey, you're the one who decided to run for the seat in the Oval Office. If you'd prefer your privacy, I understand. You are free to leave the race at any time.

Which gets me to another question I have. Your financial situation. You've released your own tax records. But looking at them pretty much just shows that you've structured your financial life so that most everything is in your wife's name. And she has recently said she'll "never" reveal her, which means also your, information. Which wouldn't matter to me quite so much if you weren't flying around on the corporate jet belonging to her company. She's always been deeply involved in the financing of your campaigns, and well, I did mention that back in the day she was financially involved with Charles Keating, right?

So, much as it may anger you, we do have a situation on record where you've used poor judgment and acted on behalf of someone financially involved with your wife, and she is providing financial support for your campaign, and yet we will "never" get details about 'her' finances?

That doesn't sound like 'straight talk' to me, 'my friend'.

I fully support your wife's desire for privacy in her business dealings, as long as the two of you are private citizens. Not if you are asking to be elected President of the United States. "With great power comes great responsibility" and all that. (You are familiar with that character the youngsters call "Spider-Man", aren't you?)


Of course, Senator, you may not care to clear up any of these questions for me, since I'd never vote for you anyway. There are plenty of compelling policy reasons to oppose you: your consistent support for foolhardy militarism, your consistent opposition to choice on abortion, your cockamamie economic and health care proposals.

But I have to say, it's the character issues that bother me the most.

Oh, and did I mention the erratic moods and the anger? That too.