The Terrorists Won

What Cheney and his gang never really understood was that the aim of a 'terrorist' is to spread fear, undermining people's basic sense of security in life, and creating the perception that the authorities are feckless and untrustworthy. It is not necessarily about killing people, but about overturning civil order by substituting reason and wisdom with emotion and panic.

Water company engineers spotted the object when they lifted up a fire hydrant cover during work on a street in Shoreditch, east London.

The road was cordoned off and a nearby pub was evacuated amid fears that the "grenade" could explode.

But after nearly an hour of analysis bomb experts realised that the cause of the scare was in fact a copy of the "Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch" used by Eric Idle to slaughter a killer rabbit in the 1975 film Monty Python And The Holy Grail.

The fictional weapon looks more like a golden ornament than a hand grenade; it was based on the Sovereign's Orb used at royal coronations.

The prop has become a popular in-joke among Python fans and replicas can be bought on eBay for as little as £14.

An spokeswoman for Islington police confirmed that the device was a toy and that had been no danger to the public.

I imagine the hour of bomb expert analysis went something like this?

ARTHUR: Yes, of course! The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch! 'Tis one of the sacred relics Brother Maynard carries with him! Brother Maynard! Bring up the Holy Hand Grenade!
[singing]
How does it, uh... how does it work?

KNIGHT: I know not, my liege.

ARTHUR: Consult the Book of Armaments!

MAYNARD: Armaments, Chapter Two, Verses Nine to Twenty-One.

BROTHER: "And Saint Atilla raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, 'Oh, Lord, bless this thy hand grenade that with it thou mayest blow thy enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.' And the Lord did grin, and people did feast upon the lambs, and sloths, and carp, and anchovies, and orangutans, and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats, and large --"

MAYNARD: Skip a bit, Brother.

BROTHER: "And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shalt be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thou foe, who being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.'"

MAYNARD: Amen.

ALL: Amen.

ARTHUR: Right! One... two... five!

KNIGHT: Three, sir!

ARTHUR: Three!

Thank goodness they didn't find a Killer Rabbit toy.