Paging Jo Frost
One of my guilty pleasures is the TV show Supernanny.
Each week, Jo Frost, a friendly British woman with plenty of child-rearing skill visits a family where the kids are out-of-control. The audience gets to view video of the kids acting out in atrocious ways, as hapless parents struggle to do a job they weren't trained for, raising well-behaved children.
One of the characteristic errors these parents make is to reinforce the bad behavior. From the audience's point of view, with the benefit of seeing edited video, it is clear that often the children are acting out just to get attention. Again and again, we see parents who fail to engage with the children when they are behaving well, sending them off to play alone.
We see heartbreaking footage of a small child asking nicely for attention from a mother who's too harried, clueless or busy with a sibling to respond, until the child explodes in a tantrum. Sometimes you can see the child's expression, and it's clear they know they're doing something their mom doesn't want them to do. Any attention, even if it's shrieking, scolding or attempts at punishment, satisfies the child's need to be recognized, acknowledged and engaged with.
Each week, this pattern seems so obvious to me, watching at home. I marvel that the parents aren't able to see it. They keep making the same mistake, over and over, until Jo Frost shows up to fix it. Jo manages to explain the problem, and train the parents in a way to actually get the behavior they want from their child, instead of exactly the reverse.
This morning's news recalls that feeling of watching bad behavior escalate.
On Supernanny, you can see that when excessive attention is being given to one kid, the others will act out, particularly if the child hasn't previously been getting enough positive attention and engagement to make him feel secure in the world.
Is it a coincidence that we're seeing bad behavior from the other members of the Axis of Evil, when Daddy W's got his hands full with Iraq? Especially since the administration's policy has been to avoid engaging directly with them?
I can't help but wonder if that pattern of behavior so obvious on Supernanny is limited to children on TV. What, I wonder, would Jo Frost make of this situation? What would she tell the administration to do?
Each week, Jo Frost, a friendly British woman with plenty of child-rearing skill visits a family where the kids are out-of-control. The audience gets to view video of the kids acting out in atrocious ways, as hapless parents struggle to do a job they weren't trained for, raising well-behaved children.
One of the characteristic errors these parents make is to reinforce the bad behavior. From the audience's point of view, with the benefit of seeing edited video, it is clear that often the children are acting out just to get attention. Again and again, we see parents who fail to engage with the children when they are behaving well, sending them off to play alone.
We see heartbreaking footage of a small child asking nicely for attention from a mother who's too harried, clueless or busy with a sibling to respond, until the child explodes in a tantrum. Sometimes you can see the child's expression, and it's clear they know they're doing something their mom doesn't want them to do. Any attention, even if it's shrieking, scolding or attempts at punishment, satisfies the child's need to be recognized, acknowledged and engaged with.
Each week, this pattern seems so obvious to me, watching at home. I marvel that the parents aren't able to see it. They keep making the same mistake, over and over, until Jo Frost shows up to fix it. Jo manages to explain the problem, and train the parents in a way to actually get the behavior they want from their child, instead of exactly the reverse.
This morning's news recalls that feeling of watching bad behavior escalate.
WASHINGTON -- North Korea is accelerating preparations for testing a missile that has the potential to strike the United States, a U.S. government official said Friday. A test of the Taepodong-2 long-range missile may be imminent, the official said.(As someone who lives only 4500 nautical miles (as the missile flies) from Korea, this isn't something I'm awfully happy about.)
On Supernanny, you can see that when excessive attention is being given to one kid, the others will act out, particularly if the child hasn't previously been getting enough positive attention and engagement to make him feel secure in the world.
Is it a coincidence that we're seeing bad behavior from the other members of the Axis of Evil, when Daddy W's got his hands full with Iraq? Especially since the administration's policy has been to avoid engaging directly with them?
I can't help but wonder if that pattern of behavior so obvious on Supernanny is limited to children on TV. What, I wonder, would Jo Frost make of this situation? What would she tell the administration to do?
posted by Paul at 9:11 AM |
|
email this
