This just in...
The Bush administration today repeated its call for Social Security to comply with United Nations resolutions, and provide information about its weapons of mass destruction. The President said that Social Security was a "growing threat" to the retirement of younger Americans.
Sources close to the White House have said that there is undisputed intelligence that suggests that the Social Security Trust Fund has been engaging in deception by claiming that it is not only solvent, but it will continue to pay full benefits well into the middle of this century. "The system has a $3.7 trillion shortfall, and we need to fix it, no matter what it takes," said the source. This intelligence would appear to contradict the report of the Congressional Budget Office, which supports Social Security.
When asked what actions would be taken should Social Security not comply with his demands, the President refused to give specific details, stating merely that he would not hesitate to take "drastic measures to protect the retirement of our country."
"Now is the time to confront Social Security," Mr. Bush told a White House economic summit.
In response to critics that suggest that the administration is steering the country toward an unnecessary action that will result in a quagmire, tying down the economic forces of our country for decades, White House sources were dismissive. "There will be no changes in benefit structure, no increase in payroll taxes, and younger Americans will greet us as liberators," said the source. "It is up to us to free the oppressed younger Americans, victims of a cruel and vicious Social Security regime, to allow them to invest in their own retirement. By freeing the productive power of their money from the tyranny of Social Security, they will all be able to get rich and retire happy, with absolutely no costs."
In a related story, newly re-appointed Treasury Secretary Snow commented today that the nation's borrowing forces were always ready to take whatever action was requested by the Commander-in-Chief. Observers and private economic consultants have suggested that the administration is planning on an initial $2 trillion "shock and awe" assault, which would be followed by a rapidly moving invasion in force. Some point to the deployment of the 101st 'Submitting a tough budget' Rhetoric Division, the 3rd "Economic Growth with Reasonable Tax Policy" Bafflegab, and the Treasury's Special "Being Wise About How We Spend Money" Forces units as a sign that operations against Social Security are already being prepared for. Secretary Snow refused to confirm or deny that such plans had been made, merely repeating that the "President has not made his decision" about whether to attack the Social Security system.
Some Democratic critics of the plan are still opposing the President, arguing for more time. "There is absolutely no credible evidence that there is anything wrong with the Social Security system that a few minor adjustments wouldn't fix. Let the process continue on its current course, and see how it plays out. There is no imminent threat," said one Senator. "Creating a $2 trillion dollar addition to the current budget shortfall now to prevent an alleged shortfall 30 years from now makes no sense! Privatization of Social Security is just wrong! It is just a distraction from attacking our real problem, the expanding deficit," said the governor of a small New England state. Others who are familiar with the issue have suggested that, if the economy becomes strong enough to provide the yields claimed for private accounts, there will be absolutely no problem at all with Social Security revenues. Karen Hughes, adviser to President Bush, today described such claims as "purely partisan attempts to harm the President, and weaken our country in its time of peril."
The Chairman of the Council of Economic Advisers responded to the Democrats statements in an interview on Fox News earlier today. "We don't want the smoking gun to be a complete failure to pay retirement benefits," he said, adding "We know that Social Security had projected solvency issues in the past. We cannot allow that to happen again."
Meanwhile, in cities around the country, there were small protests against privatization. Carrying signs saying "There is no crisis!" and "We are already free to invest for retirement!", these protesters were greeted with catcalls and shouted abuse from passing motorists.
Sources close to the White House have said that there is undisputed intelligence that suggests that the Social Security Trust Fund has been engaging in deception by claiming that it is not only solvent, but it will continue to pay full benefits well into the middle of this century. "The system has a $3.7 trillion shortfall, and we need to fix it, no matter what it takes," said the source. This intelligence would appear to contradict the report of the Congressional Budget Office, which supports Social Security.
When asked what actions would be taken should Social Security not comply with his demands, the President refused to give specific details, stating merely that he would not hesitate to take "drastic measures to protect the retirement of our country."
"Now is the time to confront Social Security," Mr. Bush told a White House economic summit.
In response to critics that suggest that the administration is steering the country toward an unnecessary action that will result in a quagmire, tying down the economic forces of our country for decades, White House sources were dismissive. "There will be no changes in benefit structure, no increase in payroll taxes, and younger Americans will greet us as liberators," said the source. "It is up to us to free the oppressed younger Americans, victims of a cruel and vicious Social Security regime, to allow them to invest in their own retirement. By freeing the productive power of their money from the tyranny of Social Security, they will all be able to get rich and retire happy, with absolutely no costs."
In a related story, newly re-appointed Treasury Secretary Snow commented today that the nation's borrowing forces were always ready to take whatever action was requested by the Commander-in-Chief. Observers and private economic consultants have suggested that the administration is planning on an initial $2 trillion "shock and awe" assault, which would be followed by a rapidly moving invasion in force. Some point to the deployment of the 101st 'Submitting a tough budget' Rhetoric Division, the 3rd "Economic Growth with Reasonable Tax Policy" Bafflegab, and the Treasury's Special "Being Wise About How We Spend Money" Forces units as a sign that operations against Social Security are already being prepared for. Secretary Snow refused to confirm or deny that such plans had been made, merely repeating that the "President has not made his decision" about whether to attack the Social Security system.
Some Democratic critics of the plan are still opposing the President, arguing for more time. "There is absolutely no credible evidence that there is anything wrong with the Social Security system that a few minor adjustments wouldn't fix. Let the process continue on its current course, and see how it plays out. There is no imminent threat," said one Senator. "Creating a $2 trillion dollar addition to the current budget shortfall now to prevent an alleged shortfall 30 years from now makes no sense! Privatization of Social Security is just wrong! It is just a distraction from attacking our real problem, the expanding deficit," said the governor of a small New England state. Others who are familiar with the issue have suggested that, if the economy becomes strong enough to provide the yields claimed for private accounts, there will be absolutely no problem at all with Social Security revenues. Karen Hughes, adviser to President Bush, today described such claims as "purely partisan attempts to harm the President, and weaken our country in its time of peril."
The Chairman of the Council of Economic Advisers responded to the Democrats statements in an interview on Fox News earlier today. "We don't want the smoking gun to be a complete failure to pay retirement benefits," he said, adding "We know that Social Security had projected solvency issues in the past. We cannot allow that to happen again."
Meanwhile, in cities around the country, there were small protests against privatization. Carrying signs saying "There is no crisis!" and "We are already free to invest for retirement!", these protesters were greeted with catcalls and shouted abuse from passing motorists.
posted by Paul at 11:54 AM |
|
email this
